Prawning on the Lake.

I am surrounded by miserable people. Here I am still dealing with pain and discomfort, on a daily basis, doing the best I can to be positive and happy. 6, 7 and 8 are dying of technological deprivation, and have keyboard envy, and Fitty well….

Fitty is unable to use nicotine patches as they irritate his skin quite badly. He thinks he is doing great without them, but in truth, I have lost my beautiful man, to a grouchy, touchy, monster. I have to be very careful how I say things to him at the moment, or I get my head bitten off. Most of the time he’s ok, but when he goes on a rant, we all bolt for cover. I have taken each of the kids aside and explained the situation to them. I told them what’s going on and not to take things personally, but I’m finding hard to take my own advice! The kids are fine, they just roll their eyes and deal with it. I am tempted to give him a good kick in the you know where. I urged him to buy nicotine gum, so he did, but he hasn’t had a single piece! Typical Fitty.  He has done this every time we have given up, ditches the patches and thinks he’s fine. One time 4 even begged us to start smoking again, as she couldn’t stand the stress of living with a patchless Fitty. I am beginning to realize just how she felt!

I have been calm and relaxed, haven’t had any cigarette cravings, and am just concentrating on finding interesting ways to eat foliage! My frustrations and cravings are all about food, watching the kids eat corn chips, or noodles!!  How I crave a big fat packet of potato chips. I sit and munch on my spinach, broccoli and carrots, wishing they were salty chips. Fitty has been very supportive on the food side of things, encouraging me to try different things and always keen to cook for me, but if he slides into a downer from the cravings, this becomes a little like an “I do everything around here”, speech. It’s so hard to see him struggling like this, but at the same time I’m getting more and more over it!

We’ve been down this road before, and I figure I’ve got about 2 weeks of this to endure. In the meantime I have the comfort of knowing that he returns to work on Monday, and will be storming through the door each day at 5pm looking for someone to engage in battle! I know we will get through this, I know that in around 2 or  3 weeks I will have my beautiful, supportive, loving man back. While I’m waiting for him, I will concentrate on my own well-being, and do my best to make sure I keep from getting pulled into the drama. It’s hard, but knowing it’s not him, but the addiction, causing all the trouble helps.

On a much more positive note, Fitty has turned a lot of his energy into a manic dynamo of a man who is getting things done around the house in record time! The kids are doing more things that don’t involve sitting around a screen, and there has been talk of an abseiling adventure soon. So exciting. I will have to give that one a miss as the harness will cause untold agony, but I can’t wait to watch the kids pick up this amazing skill.

Fitty and 7 went out prawning on the lake last night, and came back with a kilo of prawns. Fitty took a heap of photos of the 200 or so people on the lake taking advantage of this bounteous year.

It’s not all bad around here, things are getting done, I’m getting used to my new diet, and even had a little chicken last night, as I have been advised to increase my protein intake. The kids are slowly learning there’s more to life than the internet, and every now and then I get my Fitty back. Life wasn’t meant to be easy…..

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